By LaToya C. Dawkins

We are all born with the luxury of free will. We can choose what we want to do and when we want to do it. However, at four years old, preschoolers’ options are limited or are they? Preschoolers are little people with their own minds and booming personalities and sometimes they just do not do what we request of them. There is a direct link between modifying behavior and improving listening skills. As an educator there a few methods that I have used to increase listening skills and ultimately modify behavior in the classroom.

Method 1: Communicate at eye level

Communicating at eye level with your preschooler shows them that you are giving them your undivided attention. It also sends the message that what they have to say is of the upmost importance to you. Also, it is helpful to ask your preschooler to communicate with you at eye level and give you eye contact while they are speaking. Preschoolers’ minds like to wonder and some attentions spans are longer than others, however, teaching, enforcing, and exemplifying eye contact can help them focus when communicating with others. Preschoolers are more willing to cooperate when they have your full attention and eventually, tasks given and request made become receptive instead of a repetitive battle.

Method 2: Build on listen skills throughout the day

There are several simple ways to build on listening skills with your preschooler throughout the day: Challenge them to follow simple instructions (ex. cleaning the table or making a sandwich), encourage them to listen to the things in the environment around them(the sound of a bird chirping or the wind), Read aloud with them, and ask them to repeat the what is being spoken to them. Hearing is a sense but listening is a skill that can be expanded. Ask your preschooler to describe what they are listening to or talk about the events in a book that you are reading together. Lastly, take every opportunity to praise them when they are using good listening skills. I often instrinsically motivate my students by saying, “Wow, you are being such a good listener that means you are going to be so smart” or “Yes, that is a bird chirping. Do you remember when we listened to a bird chirp before?”

Method 3: Use teachable-moments to demonstrate the importance of listening

Listening is important in a classroom setting because it allows everyone to take part in a holistic learning experience. As the teacher, I can learn what my children have learned or the things they still may not understand just by listening to them. As students, they can learn new things, learn how to do things on their own and also have a harmless day just by listening. For example, during a fire drill we emphasize the importance of stopping what they are doing and then looking and listening to the teacher. A few days ago, I used a teachable moment to demonstrate the importance of listening to instructions. I was reading a book I borrowed from another teacher. One of my students kept turning the pages roughly and incorrectly. I explained to him that turning the pages roughly would rip one of the pages. He did not listen and eventually one the pages ripped. He was in shock when it finally happened. I asked him, “Do you remember what I said would happen if you kept turning the page so rough.” He did not respond. I walked him to the next class so he could apologize to the teacher for ripping his book. Immediately after he apologized he began to cry. I consoled him and then he helped me tape the rip page. While we were tapping, I reiterated the importance of listening to instructions.

Good listening skills are beneficial to everyone. As listening skills improve, behavior will improve as well. A good listener is an effective communicator. Therefore, by example, encourage your preschooler to be slow to speak and quick to listen.